One Messed Up Story
by Edward Mustang
Summary: Inuyasha is fighting Haruko? Roy Mustang takes a ride on the Titanic? Maes is the ghost of chirstmas past? o.o


**I'll tell you now. This story goes no where. Its about nothing. I'm writing this in my bored time.**

**Warning: Random characters pop in and out, insanity occurs, and if you dont understand its okay. Most people wont.**

**Disclaimer: Oh boy. Okay lets see..**

**I Do Not Own Fullmetal Alchemist, Furi Kuri, Inuyasha, Speed Racer, or The Titanic.

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Roy stared at the pile of papers on his desk. He scribbled a little dog on the edge of a document that seemed to get more and more boring as he read on.

Suddenly someone kicked open his office door.

"Fullmetal." Roy said curtly to the chibi alchemist. There is silence as the two just stare at each other. Tumbleweed rolls by.

"I demand you stop sending me on these stupid missions. I'm not getting you any more krispy creams." Ed growled. "If you don't you, sir will have to face my new friends."

Five people Roy hadn't noticed flexed behind Edward.

"This scrawny guy Ed?" Inuyasha asked unsheathing his weapon.

"Are you sure you want us to mess him up?" Kagome asked leaning on one side of Edward. "Yeah he's really handsome." Sango said. Both women had hearts in their eyes.

"Kagome!" Koga whined while she drooled on Roy's desk. Inuyasha stared at the wolf. "Why is this mangy wolf here?" Inuyasha asked Miroku who thought about it for a moment.

"Isn't it obvious? Shippo is hard to write about so I guess the author replaced him with Koga." Miroku said matter-of-factly.

"If you morons are done talking!" Edward shouted when Koga opened his mouth to speak.

Roy stood up behind his desk and slipped an ignition cloth glove on.

"I love a woman in a mini skirt but I love a good battle better." He snapped once sending waves of flames at the crew. Inuyasha leapt into action.

"Backlash wave!" He roared sending the fire swirling back at Roy. He was unprepared for this. Roy ducked under his desk as the flames burnt a whole in the wall.

"I need backup!" Roy shouted into the receiver of the phone he picked up out of no where. "Yes bring your weapon. And him. But no the kid –" Before Roy finished there was a loud smashing from overhead.

Instead of coming through the door or even the ready made hole in the wall the yellow vespa smashed through a whole new wall.

"Damnit woman I said leave the kid behind!" Roy shouted slamming both hands on the remains of his desk.

"Oh you know I love my TaKun." Haruko said hugging a struggling Naota off the floor. Miroku took this chance to step forward.

"Miss you are gorgeous. Would you mind if I asked you to bare my children?"

Harkuo brandished her guitar and smashed it across the side of his face.

"I like her already." Sango said unsmilingly.

Harkuo, without warning grabbed the back of Naota's shirt and threw him in the air.

"Canti!" She called to the robot, which was focusing on helping Kagome up. He caught Naota in his mouth just in time.

As the robot began to transform Roy jumped out of the window and sprinted across the crass to an unmarked car. Explosions emitted from behind him and he didn't need to look back to know what was happening.

He jumped into the car and sped onto the road. S soon as he got on he came up next to a while racing car.

"What are you doing here?" Roy shouted over the high pitched winds. "Your not even anime!"

"I am too! Ha-ha!" Speed Racer said not looking in Roy's direction. "I am here to win a race you see! You are driving fast so that must mean you are in the race I am attempting to win! I can not allow you to win the race!" Wit that Speed shoved the side of his car into Roy's.

"Are you crazy kid!" Roy screamed rather lady like.

"I am not! But failure is not an option!" At a fork in the road Speed crushed into Roy once more sending him off onto a bridge.

"Roy!" His boost mobile chirped. "Roy its Riza!"

"Riza don't call me now!" He said into the phone. "I'll do the paperwork later!"

Back in the office everyone was supposedly dead except Miroku who the author likes best. He groped Riza then examined the gun that was pointed at him.

"Roy you have to stop! The bridge is out ahead!" She said quickly. At her words Roy slammed his foot down on the breaks but nothing happened.

The car didn't stop!

He was quickly approaching the edge of the bridge. As the car went off he realized that the car was built on the edge of a cliff. Beneath him was the ocean.

He jumped out of the window very dramatically and flipped in the air. Suddenly he landed on something rather soft.

"It's alright! I gotcha!" Shippo shouted. He floated down to a boat and transformed back to his chibi self.

"I thought you weren't in this story." Roy said brushing himself off.

Shippo nodded. "The author added me here because it was convenient. I have to go now. The longer I stay here the longer readers will have to wonder how I knew where you would fall." With that Shippo jumped over the railing of the boats edge.

"Excuse me good sir." Roy asked tapping a captain-ly looking man on the shoulder. "What boat is this?"

The man chuckled and shook his head. "Sir does this look anything like a boat? No sir. This here is a ship. The RMS Titanic.".

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**There's more that i've already written but I dont feel like typing anymore.**

**Review people!**


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